Who has the best nipples?

Dear blog,

Tom was watching Friends with some candles lit (pause for laughter) when I came home from class and I noticed the one reason why people liked Friends so much...Jennifer Aniston's nipples. That women has the female version of a constant hard on and it is impossible to glance away. If there were a company making Nippleagra she would definitely have to give them a ring due to the medicine lasting much longer than 6 hours. So, since this worked so well for a laugh tracked, overrated, yet still made decent by Chandler show, I think one of us should take pictures of ourselves while we post AND make sure that every picture shows whomever wins (loses?) with a couple of hard nips. I'm talking glass cutting hard. I'm talking so hard that they test the hardness of diamond against them. I'm talking the kind of hard Beno wants to hit me everytime I mention how gay he is. The only democratic way for us to resolve who will be nip slipping is to put the matter up to a vote in the comment section. My vote goes to Chad because he is so ripped.

Love,

Sexy Patsy