Irrational Hatred and other notes from yesterday.

I'll tell you what, I don't think I could hate a team more than I hate the Patriots. I don't even give a shit about the "cheating" or whatever. It amuses me because it got The Sports Guy all worked up until he wrote like a 10,000 word article accusing everyone else of cheating. Personally, I would be disappointed if they had gotten a higher penalty just because it would give them an excuse for anything that goes wrong for the entire year. But I digress, what I'm trying to say is that I hate them irrationally, and it actually makes me angry that their players are [not] getting injured. LIke when someone tackles Brady, I keep thinking, if I were that fat lineman, I would probably step on Brady's junk "accidentally" as i was getting up. I mean surely they have to be just as tired of hearing how great he is. And it completely flabbergasts me how a team can go an entire game against the patriots without having someone dive helmet first at Brady's knee, or from piledriving Randy Moss into the ground breaking his back. I just don't understand it. But obviously they are the best team until somebody beats them right? Logically if you win the Super Bowl like they did then get better in the off season then everyone should say you are the best team until you are beaten right? Check.

Fantasy Checklist for Monday
1. Trade for Philip Rivers. This guy is some kind of something. I mean, ignore the fact that he basically handed the game to the Patriots in the first quarter... I mean, have you seen him jump pass? I'm pretty sure all the other quarterbacks don't do it because he patented that move or something, but I know you make your best throws when you jump and use only you arm to get power on the ball.
2. Cut Tomlinson. He didn't even attempt a pass...worthless.
3. Hire Shawne Merriman as life coach. That guy can stay positive and excited even when his team is getting bent over dumpster and violated. Even getting chained to a tree and having his girlfriend have sex with Dennis wouldn't bring him down.

Sidenote: to be honest, I thought the serial killer episode of Sunny was like 5 times better than either of the episodes they showed last week.

Lateralnote: Did anyone see the preview for that Chuck movie and even get remotely amused? Who told Dane Cook he could act, Ryan from the OC?

Adjacentnote: Just wanted to get that in, I actually don't have anything else to add.

Actually, I'm a little peeved that the office got shafted during the Emmy's, but then again, they only gave the best comedy to Arrested Development once so we already know that they are not worried about awarding the best show.

*Editor's Note: Apparently the KSK guys share my distate for Tom Brady's knees.

Writer's Block...and Hate

I couldn't really think of too much exciting things to talk about today. Just finished a class talking about segregation in which we had a 5 minute discussion relating segregated schools and gender-specific bathrooms, culminating in the professor saying, "I think you are overstating people's dislike for defecating in front of the other gender." Or something to that effect. All I could think of then was the various levels of Carl...or whatever you call it. I think Pat explained something involving a glass table, but I could have been drunk. In sum, it probably was an overstatement, because some people DO like to defecate in front of the other gender.

On a different note, I was thinking during this same class about my irrational hate of one student. We share a first name, and that is all I know about him personally. But I don't like him. I don't know why, for some reason whenever he talks immediately my mind jumps to, "what's this asshole saying now?" I guess it could be related to my natural dislike for people who share my name. You know how you feel entitled to that name, and then someone similarly monikered comes by and now you have to call him by your name(awkward) and then you get the mistaken identity head swivel when someone says his name. Really annoying. If you both refuse to be called by something different...then you just have to kill that person or make up a degrading nickname for him so he won't come by you anymore. Anyway, that's probably enough stream of consciousness for today, I gotta go back to figuring out proper federal jurisdiction.
Oh, and next time you're too tired/lazy to have sex, maybe you can move for a forum non conveniens with your girl/guy...you never know, it might work.


For those of you not hip on latin...it means inconvenient forum...i know, go figure.