I woke up at 5:30

I mean seriously... if you are dealing with people that have sleep problems, do you think it is wise to deprive them of sleep even more? I for one don't, but until I become the chancellor of Earth, I will have to submit to the wills of others. Damn democracies...

Anyways, so I had to go back in to the sleep lab to do another test. This time, it was because I was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea and had to be hooked up to a breathing machine because apparantly I have become to lazy to do that myself. I spoke with the doctor after my first lab and he said, "What you have is what we call severe sleep apnea." He said it so scary that I thought thunder was going to clap in the background and a slow zoom would happen on the Doctor's face as he laughed... but it didn't. I hate real life. He informed me that I decided to not breathe 88 times on average an hour during my first sleep lab. I told him I was just seeing how long I could hold my breath. He did not find this entertaining.

So I find myself once again in the hotel room inside a hospital, only this time I got the shitty suite. My view was of a gravel roof, the recliner was positioned beneath the TV so I had to stand up to watch it, and then, like my mother, the technician turned off the TV at halftime during the Finals... but I hear Jordan pulled it off.

It was all pretty much the same stuff as last time except this time I had to wear a mask that made me look like Maverick from Top Gun.

I told the technician she was dangerous and chomped my teeth at her... ICEMAN style.

This morning when she woke me up, I contemplated recreating the scene from Star Wars Ep III when Anakin becomes Vader. You know, slowly sit up and then turn to her and ask in a really low voice, "What happened to Padme?" Then when she said what I would go, "NOOOOOOOO" and the room would rattle and lights would break and little valves out of nowhere would shoot out steam. But instead I just acted like I was asleep still so I could sleep more, but once again like my Mom, she did not believe me. I bet she would have believed me if I were Vader...

Well, that is about the extent of my stay, I'm sure you all are really excited to hear about it. Hope the summer is going well for all and for those of you in Indy, BAC, The Chad, tonight is the night for Broad Ripplings... Prost!

Diesel Out!