The Slutmobile

So I'm wasting time in my legal research class with a few like minded law studentos when we begin to discuss this trashy girl in our class. We begin to list the attributes which would make us all believe she is a slut; multiple colored hair, visible bra straps every class, sign on her back listing prices of various sexual acts I didn't know existed, worn out look, blowing the prof, etc. when the one girl in the conversation drops what she believed to be the girl's ultimate slut move...she drives a red Camaro.

This in itself led to a large discussion into what the ultimate Slutmobile could possibly be. My own personal vote was the Cavilier. This car's price is so low that it is easy for a girl to be as cheap as her automobile., it has ample room in the back for the bimbo to get back at her abusive father, and has plenty of get up under the hood for those emergency smoke runs. I'm a personally a virgin, waiting for marriage, but I know a lot of extremely slutty young ladies who put out for Bacardi Silvers and who drove this car with the extent purpose to get a quick dickin' while they were in high school.



Game On!

Another young lad in the group had a moment of brilliance and threw out the Eclipse.* I found this car to be an amazing addition because not only did slutty girls love this car but border line harlots dropped panties hard for this "sweet ride." The Eclipse pumps up the whore factor to around 10 because the car is so easy to pimp out with bad ass additions such as flames, shitty ground effects, or your last name in Mexican writing. The Eclipse just exudes skankisity because to the untrained automotive eye the car looks like it should be kinda quick. The people like me who know/love cars and automobile magazines know that in fact the Eclipse is a piece of shit but that it is perfect for the kind of girl who will let you shit on her.

The Camaro stuck in my mind because this is the ultimate high school hip car where I grew up. Yeah, I drove a Mustang, was class president, won state when I was 13, went for over $500 in our date auction, and was the school's resident Star Fox 64 ace** but I couldn't a candle to someone rocking a Z71. I've been to some pretty trashy dance bars*** and I can say that 100% of central illinois white trash hussies drive camaros. The color of choice is maroon and the position of choice is anyway they can screw and still smoke. Hot, hot, hot. The car is also hot because a lot of them are stick and a lot of skanks like to sit on said stick. No condom. Slut.

The Camaro description actually kinda grossed me out on proofread so I'm going to move this article to the discussion section and see what you boys think the favorite for Slutmobile would be. Cheers.


*You can probably get away will the dirtiest sex acts you have ever considered if the girl is driving an Eagle Talon. This is the pre-Eclipse and it is reserved only for the most hardcore of loose women. You could be romantic with one of these whore buckets and whisper sweet nothings into her ear but it is really hard to do that with your dick already in it. Huzzah!
**Chad's high school street cred still slays me
***Stone Country, it was a line dancing bar until 10 on the weekends. I can honestly say that the grossest girls I've ever had the pleasure of "hooking up with" came from this place, which is sad since some of you have seen me with some truly poor looking ladies, but this all came while I was sober.