Your 2007 Super Bowl XLI MVP

As I start to sift through all the fall out of the Super Bowl, one of the biggest questions I have seen raised again and again was, "Does Peyton Manning deserve the MVP?" Well, I have to give my input because according to a recent survey where I surveyed myself, only my opinion counts.

So, "Does Peyton Manning deserve the MVP". Anyone who knows me knows that Peyton IS in fact on my "list"* however, I would have to bow to someone else tonight. He is a workhorse. He has moves that make opponents shake their head in disbelief. And above all, he has scored more than many will in their lifetime. My nominee for the Super Bowl XLI MVP??? The Man, the myth, the legend, the symbol...

PRINCE

I could scale down that picture, you know, create a little more room, but then, where would it end? Would we have to put an arm back on the Mona Lisa? Or how about we straighten the Eiffel Tower out. No, you can't mess with greatness. Not with abs like that, and perfectly manicured facial hair... and sprigs of chest hair, just barely exposed, DAMMIT DIESEL, focus... focus.

Ok, so let's first go through the qualifications of his performance. First off, it was raining. The man plays an electric guitar. I'm not a quantum physicist (I couldn't even spell it without spell check... thanks blogger!) but I do know that electricity and water do not mix. But you can't stop the show, not when you're PRINCE. Oh no, you strap on your high heels, sliiiiiide into those tight, form fitting, spandex pants, and gyrate your hips so sensually to the music to create that emotion that will make some men question their, FOCUS... focus.

Those are some toight pants

Next, he involved the Florida A&M University Marching 100 in the presentation. Had I known that, I would still be rocking my trombone trying to become a member of the marching band. But besides that, no real comment here, I just thought it was neat. And yes, I do realize I could make a tromboner joke, but that would be low class. And I have bad memories from grade school... so thanks for bringing up painful fuckin memories.

He loves to play... I swear to god he does.

Moving on...

Prince decided to start off with the classic, "Let's Go Crazy" that has the ultimate introduction ever written, "Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here". From then on I knew it was destiny to be a good night. He decided on some old classics, such as "Rollin on the River", "All Along the Watchtower" (boner inducing), and then took a new wave turn with "Best of You". I wasn't really sure about "Best of You". I mean, Prince couldn't ever get the best of me. Not with that angelic voice, and Aunt Jemima scarf holding back that immaculate hair. Only to be undone as the rain came down, showing his lovely manly locks. Letting the rain drip down the curls of his hair until it reached his face and ran ever so slightly, ever so gently down his smooth, silky... DAMMIT!!!

Ok, I need to end this. The halftime show was looking to go down in history as one of the best ever. But then, after "Best of You" started to wind down, I heard it. Oh yes, I heard it. Those amazing chords that I have wooed many** a woman to. The song written by Lisa and Wendy, that Prince had to realize was so great to keep his job at the club (watch Purple Rain for extensive background history), "PURPLE RAIN".

PRINCE never meant to cause us any sorrow. He never meant to cause us any pain. He only wanted to one time see us laughing. Laughin in the PURPLE RAIN. And laugh we did. We laughed, we cried, we hugged, we came together as a nation. A nation divided between left and right, North and South, Hillary's and Arnold's. We knew the most important thing that night was the fact that we were gathered there to unite. And unite we did... even if it was in front of a giant phallic shadow puppet. Did you object? I sure didn't.

So all in all, if it were up to me, Prince would be the MVP, not Peyton Manning. Oh, and PRINCE would definately pick the Caddy Corvette, not the Escallade, Peyton. I'm pretty sure those were cool about 5 years ago in Ludacris videos. But that seems like the learning curve for Peyton on current affairs. Plus, how sweet would PRINCE's Caddy be? You know that shit would be all purple with rims that had his sign on them.

All in all, it was amazing. My only regret, is that he didn't play "When Doves Cry." I almost cried purple tears. I imagine it would have looked something like this had my ultimate Prince-gasm came true.
Well, at the end of Halftime, the Super Bowl came back on and I heard one of them won. I'm just glad so far, no one has written countless articles about a black coach winning for the first time in February, which happens to be Black History Month. I'm all for diversity, but some people will never quite understand minorities and only use opportunities like this to exploit them and their accomplishments. I mean, it's hard being a minority I'm sure, when people don't understand you, and no one gets why you like certain things. No one knows why you look up to certain people or why you do the things you do, but you know what. You do, and thats all that matters. PRINCE , I want 2 B with U!!!

*Denotes my, "If I were gay list"

** Replace the word "many" with "no"